Vern Wears


Vern Wears07 Mar 2008 02:59 pm

What is Vern wearing today?

She calls it the Pink Nightmare, because of the skull-print tights and pink-black scheme, which is my favorite color combo, but then again, a 5-year-old once asked me if I was “Goth.”  To which I responded, “No,” and then tightened my spike collar and left to go shopping at Hot Topic. OK, not really.
I cried when the child asked me that, indicating I am really “emo.”
OK, not really again.
Topic change alert. Here is Vern.

The best part of this outfit? The prices.
Both the leggings and shoes were from the children’s department at Target.

Shoes: $8.

Skull leggings: $5.

Wearing clothes from the kids’ department to work when you are a police and courts reporter, and looking adorable: Priceless.

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Vern Wears05 Mar 2008 03:32 pm

What is Vern wearing today?
She calls this fashion ensemble The Floating Sheep.

On bottom: camo pants.

On top: faux sheepskin hat.

Because camo obviously blends in with everything, you might not even realize she is wearing pants. In fact, this camo is so good, you might not notice she even has legs. Hence the name of this outfit.

See for yourself.

On a fashionable note, I love this color of green. It looks great with her olive skin tones and hair color. I also dig the one-button cardigan.

The pairing of said cardigan with camo pants (of an undisclosed orgin, ahem, my closet; I gave them to her), a white T-shirt and the fun hat is a uniquely Vern move, which is why we feature her here to begin with: her creative and surprising outfit combos.

Another thing that makes today’s outfit unique is I don’t see Vern’s standard accessory (a salsa stain… It’s sort of like a “Where’s Waldo?” game).

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Vern Wears04 Mar 2008 03:28 pm

What is Vern wearing today? She is dressed like a horse-rider.

Here is an idea: Wear capris with tall boots. This prevents the need to tuck your jeans in your boots, and thereby eliminates the uncomfortable ankle scrunch. Even with skinny jeans, I still get ankle scrunch syndrome.

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Vern Wears03 Mar 2008 02:31 pm

What is Vern wearing today?
She calls this the Gramma’s Couch because it appears her pants are, in fact, made from upholstery.

Disclaimer: Apparently the couchical print is too intense for my camera phone, because I could not get a clear picture. Or maybe it had to do with me accidentally kicking my phone across the room Friday night.

The pants up close:

Plus-side of wearing a couch:
If you need to sit down, just add a throw pillow and you’re all set.

Downside:
You clash with everything, including your gramma’s couch.

Plus-side:
You’re Vern. Because only Vern would think to pair this with a green long-sleeved print tee. And we all love Vern. Seriously, we do.

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Vern Wears28 Feb 2008 03:09 pm

What is Vern wearing today?

My friend Vern is known for her quirky outfits, and about to become even more known for them.
Here is what she is rocking today: A puffy white vest, pink shirt, jean shorts and flat brown boots.
My analysis: Love it, especially the boots. The vest is great to keep her warm in her blizzardly office, where she sits huddled next to a space heater, even in the height of summer. But just in case she gets hot, she has the knee-length shorts for mid-lower-leg ventilation. The shorts-vest combo is almost like an outfit mullet. Or a S’mores. Pretty much genius.

The boots close-up:

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