The other day, I was supposed to meet my friend Brittany at Japango for lunch.
I was waiting inside, but no Brittany. Finally, I stood up to look outside to see if I could spot her.
She was standing outside the American Apparel store with a look of complete horror on her face. She was pale, teary-eyed and looked weak.
I rushed to her side, expecting to see her ex-boyfriend with another girl, or dead animal, or a murder actually taking place at that moment.
What we saw was far worse.
HUGE MASSIVE OVERSIZED PINK TIGHTY WHITIES, like three times the size of my car.

I hope and pray that I never, NEVER, NEVER see a man wearing these underwear — much less an oaf this massive wearing tighty pinkies.
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