Boulder and the Beautiful

In my heaven, everyone will dance around in pink lace combat boots.

I found these on eBay and am debating riding the bus for a month so I can afford them.

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Any input on what’s going on here would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

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What is Vern wearing today?

She calls it the Pink Nightmare, because of the skull-print tights and pink-black scheme, which is my favorite color combo, but then again, a 5-year-old once asked me if I was “Goth.”  To which I responded, “No,” and then tightened my spike collar and left to go shopping at Hot Topic. OK, not really.
I cried when the child asked me that, indicating I am really “emo.”
OK, not really again.
Topic change alert. Here is Vern.

The best part of this outfit? The prices.
Both the leggings and shoes were from the children’s department at Target.

Shoes: $8.

Skull leggings: $5.

Wearing clothes from the kids’ department to work when you are a police and courts reporter, and looking adorable: Priceless.

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What is Vern wearing today?
She calls this fashion ensemble The Floating Sheep.

On bottom: camo pants.

On top: faux sheepskin hat.

Because camo obviously blends in with everything, you might not even realize she is wearing pants. In fact, this camo is so good, you might not notice she even has legs. Hence the name of this outfit.

See for yourself.

On a fashionable note, I love this color of green. It looks great with her olive skin tones and hair color. I also dig the one-button cardigan.

The pairing of said cardigan with camo pants (of an undisclosed orgin, ahem, my closet; I gave them to her), a white T-shirt and the fun hat is a uniquely Vern move, which is why we feature her here to begin with: her creative and surprising outfit combos.

Another thing that makes today’s outfit unique is I don’t see Vern’s standard accessory (a salsa stain… It’s sort of like a “Where’s Waldo?” game).

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What is Vern wearing today? She is dressed like a horse-rider.

Here is an idea: Wear capris with tall boots. This prevents the need to tuck your jeans in your boots, and thereby eliminates the uncomfortable ankle scrunch. Even with skinny jeans, I still get ankle scrunch syndrome.

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Friday’s column in the Daily Camera features Hope’s Storehouse Thrift Store in Longmont, which raises money for humanitarian aid for major disasters and the development of depressed and needy parts of the world. Check out www.helpint.org.

My favorite part of the store is the international market, a sort of clearinghouse for products made in other countries, mostly by poor orphans and widows.

As if that’s not reason enough to shop there, here are a few of my top picks from the store:
Clutch purse, $3.
The square shape with the circle pattern looks vintage (where are my go-go boots?), and gold is still a hot color.
Pink necklace, $2.
For less than the price of a croissant, this pink can add spunk to your outfit. Plus, it feels springy and feminine.

Blue dress, $9.95
So soft and flowy. Also, I love empire waists with halter ties. They really accentuate your bust… you know, if you’re lacking one. Not saying I am. OK, I am.

Pink and white tweed blazer, by Spiegel, $12.95
Twelve bucks for a sturdy blazer is great. I also dig the pink color with the masculine feeling of a blazer. Extra props to the slightly disgressed edges of the jacket.

Vase made by orphans in Romania, $25.50
Price is a little high for a small vase, but the shop says it intentionally doesn’t lower the prices of the international goods because they want the sales to help provide a good income to the residents who make them.
I like the sleek, contemporary look of this vase. I want it in my house.

Bead necklace hand-made in Uganda, $15
Ugandan earrings, $7/pair
Having spent a lot of time in Uganda — and purchased a lot of jewelry there — I can tell you this is actually a great price. The brown-gold color is eye-catching, too. It seems to glow. Nearly everyone who walked past this stopped and wanted to touch it. I can see this jewelry paired with a simple black top.

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What is Vern wearing today?
She calls this the Gramma’s Couch because it appears her pants are, in fact, made from upholstery.

Disclaimer: Apparently the couchical print is too intense for my camera phone, because I could not get a clear picture. Or maybe it had to do with me accidentally kicking my phone across the room Friday night.

The pants up close:

Plus-side of wearing a couch:
If you need to sit down, just add a throw pillow and you’re all set.

Downside:
You clash with everything, including your gramma’s couch.

Plus-side:
You’re Vern. Because only Vern would think to pair this with a green long-sleeved print tee. And we all love Vern. Seriously, we do.

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